The Song

The first time I listened to 'My December' , I was in the Eleventh Grade sitting in my hostel balcony, it was 2003. It was December , my favorite month. I am not a summer guy. Decembers are like winters are, birds don't chirp a lot , people talk a little less and its mostly silent , a perfect to time to ponder . Decembers remind me of year ends , the year that was and the last month before the year that would be. I find myself here in this month every single year during foggy North Indian nights. I remember I could barely see a few meters , it helped ,because anyways who wanted to see more? 

Its been eight years and I am listening to 'My December' again after the first time I did. I am sure lot might have changed between the last time you heard 'Your Song' and now when you hear it, it reminds you of the exact mood when you heard it last and how it made you feel. Eight years and life hasn't slowed down a bit , its a running horse.I am again standing in my balcony. All these years , subtle flashbacks remind me of the streets I walked on , the minimum times I clocked cycling to the other side of the town.The people I liked , people I forgot and the people I had to forget.And The people I never met again. And people I never wanted to meet again. The smiles I forced , the smiles they forced.Right from getting on stage to perform for a few of them to being backstage to make others perfect for a few of them. Right from deciding my limitations to forcing myself to re-write them. A lot happened in these eight years.

I finished school. Got over with college. Had my first salary. Had my first date. Traveled the country. Joined Facebook. Joined Orkut.Left Orkut. Moved from listening to Rock , then Trance and now Dubstep. Saw two anti-corruption movements in the country.Experienced a global recession.  Saw dictators fall.Saw democracies rise.  All in these eight years. So why call it just a song?

Sametime But Next Season

The stories we live are destiny's ink

Written on papers so plastic . they never decay

So We prayed , We loved and so much else We tried

We became heroes who were remembered

and legends who never died.

The questions we ask have no answers sometimes

Hidden in sands of time, they just blow away

So We ran away , We sought the truth for miles

We became wanderers by nature

Looking over mountains while standing on Isles

The conversations just slip away during silence

Within our minds, the words just locked away

So We became known by faith, lesser by reasons

We felt like Clouds in the Blue Skies

Running for each other amidst changing seasons

Wishful Thinking

Water vapors , bubbles and dew

All stranded for an instance and nothing moves

Till a streak of sunlight melts it through

Lets keep this little secret inside our pockets

Till we become young again..

Running on hill tops and flying paper rockets

We see messages inside a bottle lying on the sea-side

All days we ran towards it , so much we tried

Till a wave crossed it over and took it back

We keep this little secret stored inside our memories

Till we become old again

And all hopes so old that wishes become debris

They fly towards the Antarctic to escape the summers

As all the chirps slowly fade away into whispers

Till the maple leaves carpet the path we walk on

You and I will sit and look at the seasons change

But all that's long been said and done before
 I just wish that we were something more..

A Faint Trace

I gave half of my looks to a distant shadow

Belief riding on a half-hearted hope

I let half of my breaths flow free in the cosmos

Faith riding upon a distant constellation

I gave half of my screams to a silent shore

Tides riding upon a hope to reach an end

I saw half of myself in the mirror again

Reflections riding upon egos and sorrows

A Figment Of Imagination.

From what I see, my hopes wait at doors waiting for the keys
But you make my fears fade away , like the clouds do to the stars maybe?

So, we are light years away, the stars gossip about our distances
But you silence me , like the sounds of universe do to the chirps maybe?

From what I see, The seconds we talk are the the hours we never made through
But you freeze me , like the winter cold does to the trees maybe?

So, we are thousands of nautical miles away , the waves whisper about it
But you mix me up, like the falling rains do to the crying eyes maybe?

Daily Roses for Peace

So true the sound

The rhythm soars and accrues

This goes on forever, till our songs find a truce..

So high this hope

The passions never scanty and few

This fire must be waiting, for the last drop of dew.. 

So cruel the generosities

The humility is on its knees

The door to love is closed, someone lost the keys..

So ambiguous our gazes

The silence must be speaking

This world is not the place, our eyes are seeking..

A Thousand You

Lines for One Perfect Star

Acting on a million crowdy stages,

Talking to strangers, monks and sages,

No one ever uttering a word. . .

We're lost in a one big maze,

In between ,we look at each other 

.. hiding our clandestine gaze.

Dancing and flying with millions more,

Conversing through melodies, opening doors,

Each smile testifies end of the war. . .

In between, we look at the skies

... looking for that perfect star.

Born between now and then,

In between , there were a million hues,

Its a circle , Oh! a vicious  one too. . .

What goes around, comes back around,

In between, I crossed myself to be you. 

A Letter to the Tiger

Dear Mr.Tiger

Your cat family is particularly amazing , and my fanfare for you is specifically not the reason why my last name is Singh. Although I always thought since childhood that except the Dinosaurs , there was never a chance that any other specie would be swept off the mainland by bamboozling asteroids, to be later discovered by future species. But I just came to terms with your terrible conditions , so much that all my attention span has been completed diverted towards you ..from the latest India TV news updates I was watching a while back.



We as humans are trying our very best to save you. Because we love you so much. Frankly, the carpets made out of your funky striped skin patterns are just too royal to resist. And your teeth , man! , they sell like gold. We need more of you here , so that we can be rich without getting into 25 year meaningless marathon academics here in India just to get a 3.5 lpa package in the end. So like million of people who want to save you, I want the same too with all my fervor and passion. You can ask my pet mouse in the house, I love you.

I hope this letter finds you in the best of your health and prosperity without any poachers plotting to kill you in next 5 minutes at-least. And I sincerely hope you complete reading this letter before you get busted. You will be happy to know that we have been running so many campaigns to save you that even the Dalits are taking a backseat for a while. Just for the record , I have made this totally ordered list for you, our plans to save your specie:

1) The facebook community  'Save Tigers, Save Our Heritage.....Just 1411 left..!' now has 150,000+ people liking it. Though it is still unknown what they like , but the efforts are commendable. Imitating our tremendous efforts on this front , one of our esteemed Indians created 'Eat Parle-G... Do not eat TIGER...Only 1411 Left' which has 12,000+ people liking it . The reason for less number of people liking this one is unknown , but it seems Parle-G is becoming highly unpopular with people.


2) This cool website http://www.saveourtigers.com  is just too tempting. Besides around 266,000+ people participating on it  , little kids are spending thousands of bucks to participate in a competition to send poems , drawings , posters depicting tigers in danger. Till now thousands of drawings have been sent , depicting you in superman, spiderman and T-man dresses. These posters help spread awareness so that more people can learn and send even more posters depicting how much we love drawing .


3) Almost every Tiger reserve in India has been allotted night guards to save you from poachers at night .(I hope you're still alive and reading this). The guards are paid 5000/- bucks a month which is 1000/- less than what their wives earn working as sweepers in local buildings. There is a 70% shortage of guards , so that some of the brave guards have to do double shifts , day and night. During day they cut tickets for the tourist , during night , they nap with their wives.


4) NDTV recently broadcasted a 1 hour long documentary on Tigers. ..which was apparently so sad and depressing that kids almost suffered a breakdown and some of the elderly Indians took overdose of their daily medicines in revolt. NDTV has asked its viewers to visit their exclusive website on Tigers, which has a column 'Tiger Tales' where you can narrate all the cool tales and poems about Tigers.You can download Tiger wallpapers too. India TV is still preparing for its own Save-Kabaddi in India campaign but it seems not too many kids can draw and narrate stories about Kabaddi , so they plan to switch to the famous kids game 'Chain-chain' .


5) We just love to talk about you in general , with friends , girlfriends and boyfriends. Boys love to impress their girlfriends by showing sympathy towards the cruelties done to you and Sati - the female infanticide in general too. And you gotta hear this!!..  Last week I saw a poster regarding Save-Tiger campaign in a Mall , people just loved it , believe me.. I mean not the poster ,the movie that was released the same day was just awesome. The movie was f-ing legendary.Trust me , you should check it out too. 


Besides all that marvelous good news , I would also like you know that monsoons are fast approaching. I hope you are looking forward to that , and when you are looking , look for the poachers too .. :\.Just to let you know, I am so glad you are our national animal because apparently besides the street dogs and pigs , we don't have much variety here in India.  


And as listed we will continue with our efforts to save you , for now its the FIFA world cup , so just bear with us for a while , we will start saving you when you are just 1350 left . Till then enjoy , peace and have lots of beer.


Hey look ...there's a poacher at your back..!




..
Just Kidding.! :P

Regards.

Why wouldn't I climb Mt.Everest some summer?

Out of all the insane and highly impractical ideas and dreams I have in life, I am not very sure about this one. I thought maybe (probability 0.25), well maybe (probability 0.001) , I could think of taking a shot at Mt.Everest after like 15 years. I am not sure of this , but I have these plans , really over-the-top plans of doing things because mediocrity has sucked in almost everything except this great nature's erection. Its almost like each one of us , even the most douche-bag of an engineering graduate would think of becoming a CEO of some company one day. Its not always possible for them, then of-course, many of these CEO-cum-hippie-culture-inflicted-wannabe's would open their own firms and put themselves on the top just to claim a dream they could never have.

So why Mt. Everest? why not just go to Simla and come back from an over-used tourist dust-bag (this when I heard about 5 Bihar dudes landing up in Simla aspiring to start a Maoist movement :\ , how lame) or go to Rohtang (orgasmic hill-station for all north indians) and take pleasure in aunties falling in the desperate attempt to try out their newly hired eskimo clothes and shoes on smooth ice. But I don't want to, because its plain and blatant , mediocrity sucks. Well, it happens with me. Almost 33% of times, I end up knowing that people have already done what I had planned to be totally cool and *new*, this world is that fast. So when I was a kid, fed-up of all the mediocrity, I decided I would grow up to be someone that everyone else couldn't be. I grew up, and observed everyone is someone that everyone else can't be. This world is that sucker-ty!

So I have dropped a lot of super-awesome plans along the way , like the Mt.Everest one. This came about when I read about this 13 year old boy called Jordon Romero who climbed Mt.Everest. Ok cool ! , but what was I doing when I was 13? , I was probably looking forward to an awesome 5 year puberty plan and maybe having a totally-not-feasible crush on a girl in my class.... If the Jordon case wasn't enough , take this , totally illiterate, less than quarter-awesome and ugly-looking-but-smarter-than-Shrek Apa Sherpa climbed the Everest 20 times , 20 times!! , that is 5 times more than I triumphed pahadi during my entire BITSian life :\ ..

If I had been preparing for IITJEE 2012 , I would have given it up already. Partly because I would have died after completing my first semester,thanks to the Mayan Calendar :\ .. and secondly because of this homie-boy (thanks to Jay-Z) named Sahal Kaushik , this dude is 14 year old and has cleared IIT this year . Ok super-awesome, but what was I doing when I was 14? I was probably now left with 4 more years of puberty plan and still wondering whether I should go for another girl or still not give up on her.... :\ , pretty mundane eh? .. So just like this, I have been dropping plans. Perhaps Everest still seems feasible , maybe I would kill the Sherpa and climb it 21 times to atleast get my name in the newspapers, or maybe get my name as many times as possible to beat Arindam Choudhary ...who knows.. :\

The point is not how many times I had to give up my plans , but the number of times I learnt the same thing: 'any age is old-enough to start something new' . Why not go out in the sun and start practicing your favorite sport now? Why not take up that book you always wanted to read now? Why not look good today because you would never look this awesome one day after now? Why not start today? Don't be a douche-bag ..! .. Start early , procrastinate later.

BITS Piranha !!

Its not easy to dodge the piranhas. Piranhas are known to have voracious appetites for meat and can smell blood from miles in slow current waters. So when you are crossing a river which are inhabited by these ugly looking all-teeth-no-brain fishes , the only way you can escape them is by dodging them, or eat them alive which is a not-so-good idea since they move around in kick-ass gangs who can do anything for each other. Famous ways of dodging include throwing a lump of meat into the other side of the waters , so that while the piranhas are busy eating , you can cross the waters on your side. Another way which requires some skill is to just cross the river with two things in mind : you shouldn't have any wounds on your body and your body movements need to be smooth. Piranhas can sense wounds on any god-damn alive thing and they just love to complete rip you off in minutes if not seconds...And ofcourse the best way to dodge is to have a boat. :\

Look around you , your life is like these slow-moving South American waters with Piranhas all around.And all you have to do is to dodge them.Piranhas in your life can come around in the form of most stupidest of the days, over-sleeping-n-missing a test day , bad weather days and that-guy/girl-needs-an-attitude-check-or-else-I-will-kill-him/her ways.

BITS has taught me some amazing things , including how to dodge-the-piranhas , which even the most attentive of my teachers here never would have noticed. All the while they were just going over and over the most impractical theoretical fast-forwarded equations , they were telling me how to dodge all that while in the class and still make a decent grade by doing it all in one night before the exam. Or if you're super-afraid of crossing the river , you can request a make-up in which case you have the option of crossing other rivers with more or lesser number of piranhas, but which one? you never know... And then there are always ways to copy others who know dodging-the-piranhas in case you are not game enough. In this case the ghotus are the obvious choice ...Ghotus are those people who will cross all those rivers that have been asked to cross the previous years to make sure they cross it smoothly this year too !!! Teachers love them.

Dodging also implies avoiding the piranhas at all , take alternative paths , not always the waters. Being with the right kind of people and doing the right kind of things , to make sure you feel good always. I have loved doing it , doing just the right things. One amazing thing here in BITS is that you can keep doing your favorite things over and over again , no matter how lame or useless, you will get the friends to do it and that kills the guilt part for ever!... Not to forget, I have met some of the most amazing people here and thanks to my inclination to imitate qualities , this journey has definitely made me someone I wasn't before I got here.

Then everyone has their own ways of dodging , which are not textbook, just skill .Hence comes the dance part, my favorite way of telling the Piranhas to be careful when they bring my name up.I just love to own those few amazing seconds on the stage. I have met people who think all this dance stuff is so over-rated. But frankly, it deserves to be. After some crappy months, if you can just go on-stage and deliver a crowd-puller , it pays for all your sins. I have loved performing here in BITS more than I used to do earlier. And because of no formal training at all , I have always despised the idea of learning the steps to a dance number and then performing it on stage , it makes dance so much seem like an exam and less of an art. Probably one of the reasons , I never wanted to join the dance club. And I just love it when you have a pedigree of performances ,and people know you for something and they expect something better than what they saw last time. Believe me I have two habits any dancer shouldn't have, I never practice my steps before a performance and I have a dance-ego.So, the trick lies in something else, which I won't disclose here. One of my favorite performances would be the last one , just because it was a total impromptu, I love it when all you do is respond to the music and this amazing things remains an art. And really , I just want to thank all those people who have loved to see me perform , thats the reason I keep doing it once every year :) ..not that I have to prove something.

Another thing BITS has taught me is how to be friend with the piranhas. You know all those people you thought were so much thadi 'n stuff or total idiots, then you realize they were actually one of the nicest! . Especially in the my psenti-sem, I have met people who I would have rarely thought of ever going along with, I have done things I have always wanted to do. I have been so much accustomed to dealing with awkward situations than ever before, that things ever rarely upset me.

... The most intriguing part is I hardly remember what kind of person I was before I came here, you know when you've been crossing too many rivers , you hardly remember the first few ones!.. Five years here and its a complete new life after this, this system changes you so much , its hard to get back. I sincerely thought of myself as a total 'geek' before I landed here who could do a bit of this and that. But this pilani life completely changed me , not that now I have super-mutant powers but I have super awesome friends whom I can die for.

Now that this part of the life is almost over , which was better any of the Government's 5 year plans! : ) .. I seriously imagine , like any other BITSian , what would it be like waking up one morning and knowing you won't be waking up in your old-adorable-antique hostel room ever again, its a feeling I would certainly hate to have....and this would be the hardest one to dodge for sure!

Now What ?!!

Almost every year since past few years this random thought comes to my mind about how stupid I was the last year! , this happens with blogging too. When I look back at my previous posts , I always feel I could have written it better , or how cool it would have been if I had rephrased it this way or that way and what not! , Infact this happens with me everyday , like when I get into an argument I generally opt to just keep my mouth shut , but I think of so many cool things I could have said to completely dismember someone's hard-earned dignity... !! :D

So , generally , for lack of better things to do , I was thinking of other things which fit into this analogy.!.. Like when I am in my mentor's chamber , its generally expected as per God-knows-who's code of conduct to keep my mouth shut , ears open , a periodic affirmative motion of my head to make sure my mentor knows I'm listening and a totally dumb "aah..what?" when I am suddenly questioned .! And then you come out of the chamber , thinking about all those geeky things you could have said to let your mentor know you're the right whiz-kid for his project or perhaps to get your name on the next publication.!

And this happens with me a lot. When I am about to go home , I think about all the cool things I could do when I get there. Although the excitement is half-murdered traveling in a TATA Bus for almost 14 hours , by the time I reach home I am alive enough just to give warm hugs to mom-dad and siblings. So half of the time I thought I would invest in meeting old pals , watching TV and getting to know cleanliness better (..thanks to Pilani ) is brutally wasted in just...sleeping.! Half of the meals I eat at home are a break from my marathon sleep pattern, so I almost forget what I ate by the time I am in senses. And when its time to watch TV at night in that warm homely quilt , I think about how stupid it is to watch TV , I mean come on there's no buffering involved , everything is just plain simply running..how boring ! . .. So when I get back to Pilani , I am still thinking about all those things I could have done at home but didn't .. !

... And ya that reminds me of one more wanna-be analogy .I am sure , on the first day in Pilani , all of us would have roamed around campus and vowed to see the Museum one day ... which till today after more than four years is left untouched !!...sweet ! And I know atleast a dozen fat/tiny folks ( no offense to those who should take offense) who were once determined to shed weight or gain weight respectively but till date they have done nothing better than ....just look worse every new semester... :D

We should probably give a name to this phenomenon , it happens with all of us right? , It sure does! .. Things we all wanted to do but didn't because we are just plain lazy or just not creative enough at the right time!! Hail psenti-semites and the wanna-be's!! =)

Yahoo-ligans! ....and Symbolism!

It is now very apparent that the thin line between observing and then executing has been widening now. Even though all the cumulative efforts of the intellectual lot of the human race over the period of couple of thousand years were directed at more vivid and clear understanding of observation skills and the required actions, we have miserably failed to comply with it and have ended up being symbols.

It is not only visible in world politics, public and social environments but also very much pervaded in our own lives. Being morally conscious has just become a part of wider symbolism. All our customs, traditions and religious rituals have become very symbolic in the sense that they all inklings towards the teachings of our prophets and the men we consecrate.In a very lucid sense, we are all now what we were told that we are , when we were born and not actually what we are meant to be. We have adopted lifestyles and routines that are more rewarding and more lucrative during the time we practice them but they slowly turn into totally worthless habits of selfish desires when it all ends someday.

When I say 'we', I am not addressing anyone in particular but those who do understand what I have and will be saying.. are getting self-addressed here. The magic wands of our leaders in form of eloquent speeches serve the purpose of assuring the country men that we will eventually be safe someday, but they fail to execute it to the level where we start witnessing the change actually. The fault not entirely lies with them. When the sheep are all indifferent , the shepherd's authority is just a symbol of worthless power.I hope you understand about the prevalent symbolism in every human endeavor I am talking about.

It exists in our lives , in our education system and every model that is attached to our lives. The protests and wars over country borders , state borders , separate independent extremist struggles , struggle for minority emancipation and struggle for much more are all part of a wider term called symbolic-protests. All these protests are real to start with , become horrible when violence chips in but end up being symbolic when they are not helped or their demands not realized as they should have. As they say "One side's freedom fighter is other side's terrorist", so you are never sure which side is right, its relative . The two political sides pounce on each other and don't actually take into consideration for whom they are actually working,that is "we". Talk about our own Government, even though things don't look that bad in the context of the present, but over a period of time, this so called democracy has just been a foul play.As I said in my previous posts, if you put worms and flies together and elect a beetle as their leader there is meant to be a chaos.In situation like ours, where our Government is concerned about the Maoists , the Telangana problem , the North Indian power struggle, the J&K border problem, the Gorkhaland problem, the Marathi chauvinism in Maharasthra , the Orissa and Gujarat riots, Arunanchal Pradesh border problem and the countless extremist organisations like RSS , VHP and Bajrang Dal who are venomous, India is a perfect potpourri. But it doesn't get worse even then , our prime minister still has the courage to deal with all these problems and still go to Copenhagen climate summit at Denmark and claim India will cut emissions. Like the poor care if India would cut emissions or not, they are smart enough to know that out of all that is possible , this is certainly not their revival plan. One way or another, India does not stand for highly popular three words 'unity in diversity' , but it stands for a country still living with its cuts and wounds and would continue to do so as long as we have diversity.In this sense, diversity becomes our strength, it atleast gives us a reason why there are problems in India unlike other countries who have a single religion and closely bounded communities and still fail to prove "unity in uniformity"!!!

Symbolism in the world is very prevalent, lets leave aside India. Take the United States, they stand for power, thats their symbol if India's is "morality". So everything they do stands for power.Even in the recent COP-15 summit, USA was meant to dictate the terms at the table, Obama's symbolic great speech's were meant to influence the great leaders present. This symbolism of 'power' has been existing even at the Israel-Palestinian border, Indo-Pak Border ,Afganistan and Iraq .

The problem that the world faces today is that its too much of symbolism and no action. The governments know that the protesters will ultimately tire down, some might even be killed but eventually nothing would happen, protests have become a 'symbol' and actually do not influence Governments anymore, take the case of Maoists who are protesters-turned-militants. Take LK Advani's Rath Yatra through which he pervaded Hindutva through the lengths of the country but not making much sense since the country has five more religions!.. probably he forgot it and in order to appeal to the Muslims later, went to Pakistan and praised Jinnah!! Indian politicians eventually end up opening the Pandora'a Box. Even in our own lives, though we endorse greener environment , we actually do not actively involve in it, we just support it like that would help, our thoughts have become 'symbols' which are moral but eventually are failures.

Symbolism in India has affected it much more than many other countries if I talk of. Symbolism combined with action is what we really need. A good example is Gandhi's Dandi March to make Salt , it was symbolic as it struck at the core of British economy and was obviously very practical. We may learn small and big things from life about relationship, society , cultures and more. But it makes no sense if we just follow our religions and our cultures just for the sake of symbolism, we have to live through them and carry them forward through actions, which was what I started this post with.If we want changes, we need our own actions and not mere protesting. You are not XYZ because you were born XYZ, if you don't like XYZ... you better be ABC , I don't care but then be an awesome ABC ..!

The Perfect Plan

Indians are known for their chauvinism ,love for bollywood (tolly , dolly, polly's included) , drop-of-hat vengeance plans,askance looks , leg-pulling tendencies , love for western culture and most varied ways of giggling. Now more than 60 years independent , we are still bounded , and because I am not a sanctimonious lecturer and I am still a callow young man , I am not going into details of it. All considerate and concerned bunch of Indians know this fact , that we are bounded. Being the largest democracy is in itself chaotic literally. Take a mosquito , housefly and honeybee ,put them together and appoint an earthworm as the leader , you have chaos.Our sensex is chaotic and only thing we are most concerned about is whats the current Rs. --> $ conversion , like dollar would be our perfect Elysian plan , our gateway to heaven.

On our fresh mornings , when we wake up and look outside the window , we see something chaotic (Kids crying , 15 different kinds of vehicles with 15 different kind of horns blazing) , and when we do that famous trick (Close your eyes , think of something good , open your eyes ,take a deep breath and everything looks just fine) , it doesn't work , what you see post-trick is 30 different vehicles with 28 different kind of horns and more kids crying.And all you do is take a deep breath and carry on with your day.

The problem with India is the part where we all 'start' thinking. We have got so much to defend that we have almost forgotten how to fight and take over something.Take for example Indian media , it shows you the best of the worst happening in the country and God do we like it !! .We absolutely love it when pigs fly (H1NI) , we absolutely care about why the Khans of the industry are not getting along with each other , and we are so seduced by the the game of politics.What fun would it be if a leader campaigned , without fighting the opposition? , What fun would it be if Dhoni performs everytime ,at the end of the day , its Indian team , their performances should be chaotic! , Indian Team on a bad day can lose to Kenya , but its fine with us because we are used to it.

We absolutely love it when western countries praise Indian software people.Obviously , if I had 10,000 people working for me even in Ghana , I will send them gratitude notes.Keep working guys , you are the cheapest available !

The solution to all this and more lies in one simple idea: 'The Way We Think' . If we had just stop worrying about debts , we wouldn't get more debts. Its like this energy flowing in this Universe , thinking about debts attracts debts , law of attraction. Or take for example "I don't want any more terrorist attacks" , the law of attraction starts working , you have more of them. Anti-war policies attracts more wars , it is very obvious the coming wars would be bigger and more debilitating. Indian techies have always been worried if US would , ever in future, start downsizing on Indian software people , there you go , its happening right now. But this law never works in the wrong directions always. We always thought (mostly because of our mindsets) , we can't have a stable Government in India , there you have it , Congress 10 years in power. Law of attraction doesn't care what you think , it just works . where your mind is.

So how does it help India? , So if you understand what I just said , the solution is clear. Instead of worrying if China would take us over (which it already has, law worked!) , focus on strengthening India.Instead of worrying about terrorist attacks (and begging Pakistan ) , strengthen our security networks. Instead of worrying about rising prices , focus on alternative contingent plans.
The law is simple , wherever your focus is , it will happen. Its like the general attitude problem that some people have .If you worry about 'not being nice' , you will end up hurting someone eventually.India needs an overhaul.

"I was once asked why I don't participate in anti-war demonstrations. I said that I will never do that, but as soon as you have a pro-peace rally, I'll be there." -Mother Teresa

Shall we start thinking better .....now?

(Inspired through my reading of the book 'The Secret' by Rhonda Byrne )

Land Of The Rising Moon

In retrospect , I think the moments always slipped away;
I glowered at you through my half-open windows!
While each of your generosities melted parts of my Heart away..


No matter how careful you are, there's going to be the sense you missed something, the collapsed feeling under your skin that you didn't experience it all. ..

Lahual and Spiti Valley || The Travelogue

"Wrapped in a polythene , tucked away safe in my mind, a little goodbye maybe or just a passing smile.."

Day 5 , Rajat and I were humming to the tunes of Coldplay's Yellow followed by Summer of 69 and some popular bollywood numbers , the German Couple were not interested but our Trek guide was constantly giving cheeky smiles like he knew every song but wasn't in the right mood to sing them along. We were sitting at the back of a Government pickup jeep which gave us lift from Kunzum peak at 4551 m height towards Batal Village (3800m) . Kunzum pass marks the start of the beautiful Spiti Valley , we had trekked from Batal to Kunzum Pass , roughly 12 kms to visit a Buddhist Monastery over there.I always wonder how do these people survive in such wintry lands.But the feeling was great , we were low on oxygen throughout the trek and out of 5 of us , only 3 of us could make it to Kunzum pass as two of my buddies had to return back owing to bad blisters on their feet.
Kunzum Temple was a small settlement in a huge snow land consisting of the conventional stupas and a priest humming the holy verses. They were least interested in us , and continued witht their chores. We paid our homage to the sage and decided to leave the place as soon as possible , as we had promised the government jeep that we would return in 5 minutes. We sat in the pickup truck and met Ingo and Toro too , who were German couple living in India for last one year , and earned their income through a Guest house near Manikaran.
We returned to Batal at around 3 in the afternoon , after a breathless trek to Kunzum and then a gifted lift we got from the Government jeep. On our parting , I offered the German couple any help , they just smiled with a big thank you , then we dispersed into our tents we had setup on the night of Day 4. Many of the tourists were stuck at Batal as the roads from Batal to Manali was closed due to a glacier , so they lacked a proper shelter , Rajat gave one of the tourists his sleeping bag , and we all collected some jackets we were not using for the night to the people.This night we were pretty tired and decided to rescind any plans of playing 'Poker In the Candle Light' as we had been doing previous nights.

Prateek along with me used to sleep in one tent , and Rajat, Nikhil and Sumit in the other tent. Before sleeping we used to light a candle to make the tent a bit warmer and comfortable , As the night's sleep slowly grasped me , I had a flashback of all the days we had spent on this Trek , the Day 1 to start with...

Day 1 ( Chattru - 3300 m height)
We boarded a Taxi from Manali to a small Vilage called Chattru and decided to camp their for the night, we were pretty excited about the 17 km trek from Chattru to Chota-Dara which we had to start the next day. Prateek ,Nikhil and myself decided to peel some Onions sitting on the numerous striated rocks that walled our tents. Sumit gave us some handy tips on peeling! , he had most of the wisdom as far as coking was concerned , and was undoubtedly the 'cook of our Trek' !! :P , But the Guide was equally helpful and we came to know about his skills in cooking when he along with Sumit prepared a delicious Rice-Dal meal for the night.It generally goes dark around 6:30 pm there , so we got into our tents quick before the chilly winds could thwart any of our plans. We discussed if the 'food' we had bought was enough to survive for 10 days and decided to buy some Kerosene from the Village Dhaba in case our stoves run out of it.This was our first night , we were excited , eager and fresh.We played Poker for around 2 hours till our eyes gave in , and we went into our tents for our first night at the camp.

Day 2 (Trek from Chattru to Chota-Dara , 17 Kms)

We started at around 10 in the morning after a simple Bread Jam Breakfast. The first few Kms of the trek were damn quick , the 10-15 kg rucksack that each of us carried seemes like a cotton bag for a while .It was after around 5 kms , that Prateek started having itch around his toe area , a sure indication of a future blister. Rajat was the only one who was walking without any problems. Even I started having problems with my feet , with land so barren and full of rocks , its difficult to avoid a blister or two. After around 7-8 kms , we sat for our packed-lunch which was some Chapati's along with Egg Bhurji , the stoppage was a well deserved rest as every inch of cloth on our bodies started seeming like a Kg each. Dragging around 12 Kgs of rucksack for 17 Kms was a mammoth challenge for each one of us, and by the end of it we were all so tired that we were worried for all the days that were to come. I had a severe Knee problem , that I had developed during my Long Distance running practices for BITS Athletics Team in my second year , Prateek had a really ugly blister , Sumit had developed digestion problems and mild fever , Nikhil had general tirednedd and Rajat was the only one looking good.We discussed during the night in our tents whether to start for the Trek the next day or not. I had made it clear , that if my Knee problem continued I won't be able to walk the next morning.Everyone was being pretty hospitable to each other and we decided to see how everyone was behaving the next morning to decided whether to trek for Batal or not.
Day 3 ( Rest Day at Chota-Dara)

As soon as I woke up , my Knee had developed bad pain and Prateek's Blister was looking worse , so we all decided to rest at Chota-Dara for the the day. I applied a lot of 'moov' around my knee joint area and did nothing but rested in the tent for the whole day while others went around the place and clicked some beautiful pictures of the valley at 3500 m above sea level.After a promising day of rest , and all hopes for the next day retsing on me and Prateek , we ate some Rice for the night and rested for the night after a long round of poker :) ..


Day 4 : Trek from Chota-Dara To Batal ( 15 Kms)

We heard that a pickup truck goes every morning to transport labour from Chota Dara to a point where the road from ChotaDara to Batal was blocked which was roughly 8 kms from Chota Dara. So we got ready by 9 in the morning and started waiting for the truck , in the meantime we had a clicking session during which we posed all we could :P , and also clicked a Team pic , consisting of 5 of us , 2 porters and 1 guide.
During the Trek...

The truck had dicthed us , after an hour of waiting , we decided to walk all by ourselves , we were fresh from wounds and were still very fragile. I was all the way hoping my knee troubles wont come back.
After three hours of walking and roughly covering 6 kms , we were lucky to get a vehicle on our way which was going towards the Batal till the point where the road was blocked. So the driver agreed to drop us till that point for 200 bucks , we quickly packed our luggage into the jeep and sat on top of it. This was one of the best moments of the trip. After a day of rest , and sunken hopes , we were back to trekking instead of the bad knee pains ,blisters and running fevers.The journey on top of the jeep was amazing , on my left was a deep valley and I was clinging to the jeep carrier with just one of my hands , it was wild , and next part of the trek was to be more challenging , we were to walk on the snow for a couple of Kms which was majorly the part of the road which was blocked. We were the first trekkers of the season to successfully pass through the frozen snow to reach Batal as all the previous tourists , mostly in vehicles had to return due to road block.
After walking for around an hour in snow , we decided to sit for lunch.Moreover , our feet were damn cold due to cold water seepage into our shoes , thanks to the good sun shine , I was able to dry my shoes , otherwise my feet had felt like a frozen toe kept inside a freezer :P , After much needed rest , we covered the last 5 km stretch non-stop , with me and Sumit leading the rest. I reached Batal 10 mins before everyone else :) , and it was sweet success after all the previous day drama , Batal was a lonely planet with no human around except the Dhaba wala , and a guy from Chandigarh who was stuck there due to road block.

Back to Day 5 ... ( Batal to Kunzum Peak Trek)

We came to know that Chandertal Lake road was blocked due to heavy glaciers on the way , so our guide took us towards Kunzum Peak which was at a higher altitude than Chandertal Lake , now we were trekking towards the Spiti Valley , after walking through almost whole of the Lahaul Valley. Spiti Valley can be easily recognized by barren mountains with no greenery whatsoever , somewhat like the popular Ladakh Landscape. Spiti Valley is known for its devout Buddhist population. So out of 5 of us , Prateek and Nikhil returned half-way as their blisters had made it an utter pain to walk , leaving me , Sumit and Rajat to walk along with the Guide towards the Kunzum Peak.
Here oxygen was a major problem , the shortcuts that Guide provided us with took most of our breath away. I could hardly walk a couple of steps before I had to regain my breath again. Even the feet were giving in , Sumit was also facing breathing problems but the Guide seemed immune to any sort of breathing problems. So very slowly but steadily we moved towards the Kunzum peak which was always visible from far due to the colourful flags that adorned the Buddhist Monastery at the top.But reaching there became a terrible hard work for all of us. Occasionaly , we used to find ourselves stuck inside soft-snow and glue-like mud , sometimes the slope was so steep , we didnt even had time to stop and regain breathing , so through hard and tough , we kept walking.

On reaching Kunzum , we were met at the peak by a Govt. official who was inspecting the roads , and offered us lift back to Batal , it was here we met 'Ingo and Toro' , the German couple who had come from Laso (Spiti) and were stuck at Kunzum , so the Govt. Jeep was a welcome relief! , the German couple then accompanied us all the way back to Manali , taking lifts along with us , I had a healthy talk with them during the trek and came to know they lived a complete nomadic life in india , and next they plan to move to australia...

I opened my eyes and saw myself in the bedroom of a Hotel at Manali , last 7 days were like pure challenge and I again remembered my favourite moment of the trip , Rajat and me humming the tunes of Coldplay's Yellow ...

"Badle raaste jharne aur nadi
Badle deep ki tim tim
Chhede zindagi dhun koi nayi
Badle barkha ki rim jhim
Badlengi rituen ada
Par main rahungi sada
Usi tarah"

In a Flick Of My Eye

Don't follow me , I am lost too

We are moving in circles into a never ending abyss

Don't cheat me , I am engrossed too

We have been doing this to each other for so long now

Don't call my names on lazy afternoons

When we could have been like curled hairlocks in mornings

Don't open my door again

We have been changing locks to it for ever since

Don't pray for my wellbeing

We have been endlessly confessing it to the Gods above

Don't fall right in my arms ever again

We have been catching each other forever since...

All I could remember from last four years..

Days Go By

If skies will remain blue forever ,the voices shall speak and smiles would aver..

then I thought~~,

If it was even this much true , atleast the smiles will continue forever~~..

The differences shall dissolve, the cause would be yours atlast,

A sudden ray of hope smiled through the lips and said this one might be the last..

Is it an enigma or a vicissitude of my own existence?

Blurred ,yet walking , a thorough penance~~..

And the days go by like they always do,

Dawn to dusk ,from dryness to dew..

I succumbed to the faith that I'd put in you.

A sudden end to what could have been something new..

A memoir that would fade into neverending~~..

And in the Wind of all that's been said and done before..

I'll wish that we were something more.

When everyone takes a day off..

Talking about potential , endurance and a plan.There is always one of these we need to propogate smoothly through these lives of ours. A sudden blink of an eye when that sharp beam of sun-ray pierces through our sensitive vision , or an occasional scream when something brings chills down our spine , we are delicate right from where we start and where we plan to end. In the middle of commercialism and behind black-shaded sunglasses , we are aware.Aware that there is something you fear , something you would avoid just to maintain an image of yours , something you know you are not good at , something that keeps you surfaced . A voice often speaks within each of us , telling us there is a lot of truth we don't know , a lot we can't comprehend , a lot we aren't meant to know...

Few days back , on another of the frequent trips , I planned to dive out of the raft like I used to do at the municipality swimming pool during school , only difference was that it had been years since I swimmed last and the water was freezingly cold. With life boat around , the fear wasn't swanning around much , plus I knew how to swim. I saw others diving one after another , it was sort of cool , everybody oscillating with the water contours and the waves, until I decided to try out swimming along with the water current and maybe cross the raft , nothing was planned , it was just one of those childish urges you get when you dive into known domains. Few minutes on , I stopped to get some of the breathing back , it had been more than a lot of minutes since I was swimming arduously. Soon to my knowledge, I couldn't get my breath back , the life jacket was a bit too tight , I carelessly loosened some of the jacket straps so that my lungs could take in more but the problems increased , with no motion below, my legs were freezing . I soon realized its not a bad idea to dive into waters with a life jacket , but it is definitely not advised to swim ( with proper technique) with/against the current at low temperatures . #1: Lower temperatures require more effort from the body per activity. #2 Blood regulation slows down , you need more breathing per inhale when you tire down at low temperatures. I immediately started cycling with my feet without moving upper body, I knew this old trick from my coach (whom until now I considered to be useless) ,  the friction between water and body keeps the blood going plus I loosened up the straps a little to get back my breathing.It worked and I could sustain myself till the raft could reach me and pull me up.

Seven years back , family planned a trek , 20 km long , once way. So basically I have this problem of digesting stale food (.. dont laugh , some people can..) , so all the paranthas that I ate from some dhaba were basically not planning to metabolize soon , they all started coming up. And the problem was I was in the middle of a trek , already 9+ kms from the start and moreover , I was feeling weak , it was cold plus every single step that I took ,killed a lot of my strength. I came across a vendor , took some glucose from him , and started taking it in small doses , till I mentally felt , the thing was affecting me somehow. But the fact was , all other people , were a lot behind me , and no one knew #1. I was feeling weak and pukish. #2. I use to tire out like hell after few metres of trek. So what I did was what I invented there and then. If I breath through my mouth like all tired people do , I tire more. Inhale through the nose , take in as much as you can , exhale it when you are taking the heavy elevation steps, always works while trekking , it has been working for last many years , you walk more , tire yes , but slowly.

A lot of what I learnt in past few years infact never knew could come back to me in situations never expected. As some say , God will leave you at places , where no one can come and help and all you can do is scream , it can be a night before exam when you know nothing , it can be a helpless stare when you are left wondering , or it can be a song , which loops so many times on your audio player , that you feel utterly helpless getting it out of your head. As I said in the beginning "In the middle of commercialism and behind black-shaded sunglasses , we are aware.". . ..Answers speak through situations and God puts you through them to know whether you are game enough for the next level..

Image courtesy : Assassin's Creed (PC Game )